Okay, fellow goyim (aka non-Jewish folk), gather round. You will want to hear this.
At Passover, there are certain foods that are forbidden. The precise restrictions depend on how observant you are (and a few other things that are way too complicated for our purposes), but one thing that is universally agreed-upon is that you are not supposed to eat food that is leavened. This is to commemorate the haste with which the Hebrews had to flee Egypt – so fast that they couldn’t even wait for the bread to rise before they baked it for the trip.
So regular bread is off-limits. So are regular cookies, cakes, pies, pancakes, and a host of other foods. This isn’t so bad – hey, it’s just 8 days, and people stick to Atkins longer than that. But the Seder – the ceremonial meal meal of symbolic foods eaten at Passover – includes a time for a Festival Meal. Coming up with an appropriately festive dessert when leavened foods are forbidden was always a challenge for this goy-doing-her-best.
Then I found Candied Matzah. And life took on a whole new meaning. It’s delicious, it’s special, it’s easy as all get-out, and if the matzah in your store isn’t on sale yet, it will be in another day or so. Snap it up while you can. I’ve had this prepared with saltines and with club crackers, and those are good, but I promise you, matzah has them beat. Oh, and make sure you buy plain matzah for this. Egg matzah tastes better for regular eating, but you need the crisp plainness of ordinary unflavored matzah for this dish.
So. Here’s what to do.
1. Turn the oven on to 350.
2. Line a cookie sheet (9×13, 10×12, 15x whatever) with parchment paper. Wax paper would probably work, too, but make sure you use something, or you will be scrubbing your pan until Christmas.
5. When the butter/sugar mix is lovely and blended, pour it over the matzahs and spread it around to coat all the tops.
6. Pop the pan in the oven until the butter/sugar is bubbly, about 10 – 12 minutes.
7. Take it out of the oven and sprinkle on about half a bag of chocolate chips. (Or, mayhap, chopped-up leftover bunny?) Let it sit for about five minutes.
8. Once the chocolate is melty, spread it to coat the matzahs. Sprinkle with chopped walnuts. Pop it in the fridge until it’s set, and then break it into pieces to serve.